My extended family is broken.
I know I’m not alone.
A 2022 YouGov national survey reported that 1 in 4 people are estranged from a family member.
Fractured family relationships come with sadness, frustration, and much hurt.
I always wondered what it would be like to have parents and siblings who are a true source of encouragement and love for each other.
After years of trying to improve the situation, the struggle continues.
I repeatedly give it to the Lord and ask Him to help me be obedient to Him by following the instructions in His word.
Be loving to every member of my family. (1 Peter 4:8)
Be kind even when unkindness is given in return. (Luke 6:27-35)
Be quick to take frustrations to God in prayer instead of voicing them. (Ephesians 4:2)
Be humble, as I am far from perfect. (Romans 12:10)
Be gracious with my actions and words in difficult circumstances. (Proverbs 25:11)
For all the countless hours contemplating it (and sleepless nights), I still don’t understand. To make the matter more confusing, some in my family are Christians.
Life is messy. Believers won’t always get along with each other.
In an effort to accept the reality of my situation, I take comfort in knowing my Christian family members and I are going to heaven. This means our broken relationships will be made perfect at that time.
God is sovereign and has placed us in the family He chose. His choices are never random; they always have a purpose.
We may never know why we must go through family struggles, but God has His reasons. (Isaiah 55:8-9)
If your family relationships are causing heartache and pain, remember the only thing you can control is your behavior.
I’m no expert. I haven’t figured it all out. But I know hope is found in God. He calls us to persevere.
Follow God’s instructions on how to treat others. Pray and ask God what you can do to move forward even if your efforts change nothing.
I try to focus on positive memories instead of bad ones. I look forward to the time when saved family members will gather in heaven, where the things we couldn’t work out will be forgotten. None of it will matter anymore.
Till then, I will do the best I can to deal with the situation in a way that honors God.
If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.
Romans 12:18 (NKJV)
It’s hard when one needs to step away to be safe. Personality disorders and potentially criminal behavior.
I pray daily for that family member, and take much comfort in our heavenly reunion one day.
Sadly, the subject which you have so eloquently described is all too common. I have found that the more I pray for the person who has alienated themselves from me without cause, the less anger, resentment or bitterness I feel towards them whether or not the relationship is ever restored.